After our conversation Jacques promptly fell asleep.
And here I sit in labor, waiting and praying and praying and waiting.
I really wish I could have an epidural...
Wednesday, November 2, 2011
Labor
This afternoon, our adoption agency had our homestudy social worker call and interview Jacques. I was in the car driving home from a Techno Forensics Conference that I had been at in Myrtle Beach, SC since Sunday. I had no clue that this was all going on until I arrived home at 10pm, and Jacques told me that our agency consultant would be searching the shared list for Juliana at 1:30am EST.
Tuesday, November 1, 2011
Happy Ending?
Happy ending? End of the story you might think? Not so fast.
Our adoption agency requested that we write a letter to administration explaining to them why we are wanting to bring home “virtual twins”, and why we believe our family can handle the adoption of a child who has been deemed “terminal”.
Dear AAI Administration,
Our family has been praying for a long time about who we will bring into our family through the miracle of adoption. We began the adoption process knowing that we would come across children that would melt our hearts, situations that would break our hearts, and challenges that would stretch our hearts. We have learned so much about who we are through all of this. We are thrilled beyond belief about our little daughter Nianshu, and we are also pursuing the opportunity to bring Quiyan into our family too. Many people have asked us why we would choose to adopt a child that faces the odds of survival that Quiyan does. People have asked us why we would attempt to bring two children home at the same time - especially being so close in age. In some ways, the answer to those questions is, "We don't know". There are times in life when you do something because for whatever reason, you believe it is the right thing to do. Although there are many unknowns, you realize that the righteous live by faith, and you make a decision not because you can predict the outcome, but because you believe so deeply in a cause you are willing to risk a lot for it.
All of our lives, people have taken risks, demonstrated love, and invested in us and our futures. They modeled for us that love is not about what you can get, but about what you are willing to give. We are willing and desperately desire to give a home to this precious girl, Quiyan. Every human being on the planet - no matter what situation they are born into - deserves to know, feel, and experience unconditional love. That is what we can give. We talk with our two girls constantly about life and death, and the reality that even children get sick, face difficulties and sometimes die at a young age. I can't imagine a better environment for a child facing these obstacles to be adopted into.
We know that Qiuyan is close in age to our daughter Nianshu that we are already approved to bring home from China. In our eyes, this is not a negative, but potentially a huge positive. We see this as an opportunity for our girls to embrace two new sisters. We see the potential for these girls to help each other adjust and adapt to a new environment and life while having an incredible bond from potentially similar experiences. We understand fully that we may adopt Quiyan, and that her medical bills may be significant - and then she might die. However, it would be a far greater tragedy that this precious child might never experience the love and joy of a family who will do everything within their power to shower her with unconditional love and embrace her for all of her days.
Thank you so much for considering offering us this blessing!
Peace and Goodwill,
Jacques and Emily
Our adoption agency requested that we write a letter to administration explaining to them why we are wanting to bring home “virtual twins”, and why we believe our family can handle the adoption of a child who has been deemed “terminal”.
Dear AAI Administration,
Our family has been praying for a long time about who we will bring into our family through the miracle of adoption. We began the adoption process knowing that we would come across children that would melt our hearts, situations that would break our hearts, and challenges that would stretch our hearts. We have learned so much about who we are through all of this. We are thrilled beyond belief about our little daughter Nianshu, and we are also pursuing the opportunity to bring Quiyan into our family too. Many people have asked us why we would choose to adopt a child that faces the odds of survival that Quiyan does. People have asked us why we would attempt to bring two children home at the same time - especially being so close in age. In some ways, the answer to those questions is, "We don't know". There are times in life when you do something because for whatever reason, you believe it is the right thing to do. Although there are many unknowns, you realize that the righteous live by faith, and you make a decision not because you can predict the outcome, but because you believe so deeply in a cause you are willing to risk a lot for it.
All of our lives, people have taken risks, demonstrated love, and invested in us and our futures. They modeled for us that love is not about what you can get, but about what you are willing to give. We are willing and desperately desire to give a home to this precious girl, Quiyan. Every human being on the planet - no matter what situation they are born into - deserves to know, feel, and experience unconditional love. That is what we can give. We talk with our two girls constantly about life and death, and the reality that even children get sick, face difficulties and sometimes die at a young age. I can't imagine a better environment for a child facing these obstacles to be adopted into.
We know that Qiuyan is close in age to our daughter Nianshu that we are already approved to bring home from China. In our eyes, this is not a negative, but potentially a huge positive. We see this as an opportunity for our girls to embrace two new sisters. We see the potential for these girls to help each other adjust and adapt to a new environment and life while having an incredible bond from potentially similar experiences. We understand fully that we may adopt Quiyan, and that her medical bills may be significant - and then she might die. However, it would be a far greater tragedy that this precious child might never experience the love and joy of a family who will do everything within their power to shower her with unconditional love and embrace her for all of her days.
Thank you so much for considering offering us this blessing!
Peace and Goodwill,
Jacques and Emily
Monday, October 31, 2011
Godwink
Today I experienced a miracle...a Godwink. A Godwink is what I refer to as a reminder from God that He is all knowing, all powerful, and in control of every little thing that happens to us.
I received an email today from Patty, Juliana’s Guardian Angel. Her adoption agency, Wasatch, was the one who pulled Juliana’s file from the shared list yesterday! An agency consultant, Sabrina, put Juliana's file on a 72 hour hold. Wasatch getting her file was truly "accidental"...it was a Godwink. Sabrina didn't know she was actually getting that file since all of the Wasatch families had already had the opportunity to review Juliana's file. Ironically, when all the new files from the Oct. 29th shared list came out, Wasatch sent Patty the files they got, but only one file came through on her email. All the other files bounced back. The one file that came to Patty was Juliana's.
That's when Patty sent this email to Kathy:
A few phone calls later, I had an email in my inbox with the golden ticket. Kathy emailed Patty the exact day and time that Juliana would be released back to the shared list so that our family could lock her file.
Here is what Kathy emailed back:
I received an email today from Patty, Juliana’s Guardian Angel. Her adoption agency, Wasatch, was the one who pulled Juliana’s file from the shared list yesterday! An agency consultant, Sabrina, put Juliana's file on a 72 hour hold. Wasatch getting her file was truly "accidental"...it was a Godwink. Sabrina didn't know she was actually getting that file since all of the Wasatch families had already had the opportunity to review Juliana's file. Ironically, when all the new files from the Oct. 29th shared list came out, Wasatch sent Patty the files they got, but only one file came through on her email. All the other files bounced back. The one file that came to Patty was Juliana's.
That's when Patty sent this email to Kathy:
Dear Kathy,
This is Juliana.... PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE be the
HERO. My friend Emily has loved this little girl with all her
heart, soul and mind ever since I was the first one to get her
file.
She and her husband DESPERATELY... like you have NEVER had a
family before... WANT this little one... even with two years
to live.
PLEASE tell me you can give her to them. She has LOI written through her agency. We have emailed over 100 times in the last 3 months about
Juliana.
Patty
A few phone calls later, I had an email in my inbox with the golden ticket. Kathy emailed Patty the exact day and time that Juliana would be released back to the shared list so that our family could lock her file.
Here is what Kathy emailed back:
Sabrina
and I are fine and excited to release her to this family. However it
has to go through the computer so below is the EXACT time (and day her
file will be released back to the shared list. Who is the agency? They
better be willing to stay up late and get this file for her!!!! My
heart is beating so fast right now because I am so happy for this
family. Ahhh - this makes my night! This is what adoption is all about truly!
Her file will be released at 10:30 pm on 11/2/2011 PST. Good luck!!
Now to Him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to His power that is at work within us (Ephesians 3:20).
Thank you Jesus for hearing our desperate cries for our sweet daughter!
Sunday, October 30, 2011
No Luck
Our agency consultant searched the shared list for us, and she was unable to find Juliana. Either the family decided to proceed with her adoption, or she was picked up by another agency. Several people have their eyes and ears open for our family to see where Juliana ended up.
I’m not sure how much more my heart can take...
I’m not sure how much more my heart can take...
Friday, October 28, 2011
Broken System
My biggest fear came true. Our agency consultant called Juliana’s agency today, and found out that her file was pulled by CCCWA last night. She said that it went to the shared list but then disappeared within a few minutes. It's likely that an agency has it locked for one of their families. Our consultant will check back in around 72 hours to see if the family decided to proceed or perhaps send her back to the shared list.
I am still in shock, and furious at this broken system.
I am still in shock, and furious at this broken system.
Wednesday, October 26, 2011
Injustice
As of today, hundreds of families have reviewed Juliana’s file, and every single family has turned her down since she has the diagnosis of “terminal”. Our agency consultant called Juliana’s agency today, and she was told that the family who was seriously considering her is still considering. She was told to call back on Friday.
Every month, China releases a Shared List of all the children with special needs who are available for adoption. At the very moment the list is released, adoption agencies all over the world search through the list and “lock” files for their clients to consider. The family only has 72 hours to proceed with the child’s adoption or else they are sent back to the shared list. Adoption agencies can also request to have a specific child assigned to their agency for 90 days so that they can try to place that child with one of their families.
At this point, Juliana has been on her agency’s individual list for 135 days. My biggest fear is that the CCCWA will remove Juliana from the agency she is with, and then she will end up back on the shared list. Once Juliana hits the shared list, she will likely bounce from agency to agency and face rejection after rejection.
Every month, China releases a Shared List of all the children with special needs who are available for adoption. At the very moment the list is released, adoption agencies all over the world search through the list and “lock” files for their clients to consider. The family only has 72 hours to proceed with the child’s adoption or else they are sent back to the shared list. Adoption agencies can also request to have a specific child assigned to their agency for 90 days so that they can try to place that child with one of their families.
At this point, Juliana has been on her agency’s individual list for 135 days. My biggest fear is that the CCCWA will remove Juliana from the agency she is with, and then she will end up back on the shared list. Once Juliana hits the shared list, she will likely bounce from agency to agency and face rejection after rejection.
The injustice of this all is that JULIANA HAS A FAMILY!
Saturday, October 1, 2011
Be Strong and Corageous
This morning while I was doing my bible study, the verse I was focusing
on was Joshua 1:9
on was Joshua 1:9
Be strong and courageous.
Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged,
for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you will go.
Oh how I needed that this morning! Jacques and I are desperate to share Jesus with Juliana. I was feeling really discouraged when I woke up this morning. FEAR (False Evidence Appearing Real) keeps creeping in that a non-Christian family will adopt her. If she only has 2 years to live on this earth, I want her to live with the knowledge that death is NOT the end. I am not of the mindset that our family is better than any other. I know there are moms out there who are crafty and can sew beautiful clothing for their little ones...I cannot even sew a button. I know there are dads who make more money than my husband and I put together. BUT, one thing we make sure our children know from the very day they are born (or adopted) is that Jesus loves them. There is no sweeter sound to my ears than hearing my 3-year-old thanking Jesus in her prayers for dying on the cross "to make her sins go away". My 6 year old has a faith and belief in Jesus Christ that cannot be shaken. She is our little evangelist and boldly brings Christ into her public school...every...single...day!
We have already sent a care package to our daughter in Shanghai along with a letter telling her how much we love her and Jesus loves her. What a privilege it would be to be the Mommy who gets to teach Juliana how to sing "Jesus loves me".
Oh how I pray that I get the chance...
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)